A lot of parents complains his child is not obedient, not be the word that the child does not agree to listen to parents sometimes actually, however the skill that parents did not master and the child talks. I take my a few little experience now share with everybody, the hope can give you a few helps.
The first recipe: Also turn oneself into the child namely
Whether does parents have a childishness, it is very important.
Still retain childlike, ability is cast " adult " , " parents " wait for the identity. Admitted the child when you, the child just admits you likely.
The 2nd recipe: Get along closely with the child.
Want to know the child, want to be contacted with the child more, know their think of a way from inside their language and behavior, be fond of, immanent need.
The 3rd recipe: Notice the child's reaction and attitude.
Contemporary parents busies as a result of the job, when talking with the child, the constant regular meeting is urgent opinion that expresses oneself and directive, expectation child is darling if illuminating oneself, do, had better not have an opinion. So, often listen without the carefully word the child, child sense and parents are communicated uncomfortable, acting channel inevitable deeper and deeper.
The 4th recipe: Experience the child's feeling.
Sufferred outside when the child as grievance, detached as good friend or beloved pet when, his exquisite little heart will be sad a long time. Parents just is however tell him blindly " irrespective, a bit firmer " , "This that's all right is very hard " , can let the child feel parents cannot experience his feeling, if parents says: "Are you very sad? I if you also can have this kind to experience. " believe to be able to have disparate effect.
The 5th recipe: Know development extent of the child.
If parents all says some of child that he cannot understand, or those who put forward short of of a few children want to show, believe not only the child feels hardship, pressure is great, close child dialog also certainly will is built hard on line.
The 6th recipe: Answer the child's inquiry.
When the child raises a question, should understand its first real implication, the need that is aimed at the child makes a reply. For example the child asks: "Mom, you should not buy food? " the real significance of this problem is actually: "Mom, I want to buy food with you together. " if you know real purpose of the child, can say: "Be! Should you go together? " the child listened to sure meeting very glad.
In addition, to the intellectual sex question that child place raises, parents also should respond cautiously, or taking the child to seek the solution together, such, the child encounters what problem no matter later, the metropolis is active enquire to parents.
The 7th recipe: Avoid to use the talking mood of negative meaning.
Cannot use " I command you... " , " I warn you... " , "You had better hasten... " " be restricted you are inside 5 seconds... " , " my number arrives one, 2, 3. . . . . Otherwise... " " you should... " , "You are really stupid " , " hello annulus " , " you too make me disappointed " , " not OK... " etc contain direct, command, warning, menace, blame, the fling abuses, conversation mood that rejects to wait for negative meaning.
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